Stories from Sendai, Issue #15, August 15, 2003

Hi again!  It has been a really long wait for this one - we know.  New babies can do that.  Yes, our little girl was born May 8, and we haven't been the same since.  Later on in this letter, we'll describe the experience, but for now, we will try to go in rough chronological order from the last letter.

Near the end of March, we got to experience a Japanese wedding.  It wasn't completely traditional, but it had enough of those elements to be of interest to all of you.  Our friends, Steve (American) and Noriko/Valerie (Japanese) were the bride and groom.  They had the ceremony at the wedding chapel of the New World Hotel in the northern part of town.  As a matter of fact, Western-style weddings are big business here in Japan, and most large hotels have a wedding package for sale. The wedding chapels are generally smallish (weddings are expensive, and large numbers of guests are kind of uncommon), seating about 50.  Often, a foreigner will perform the ceremony as well.  Several of our friends from church regularly do this.  It is a nice side-job for extra spending money.  The guys we know read from a script in Japanese, but lend a certain "Western-ness" to the whole affair. Oddly enough, these wedding chapels can be easily confused by Western visitors as legitimate Christian church buildings.

There are generally three ways to get married in Japan.  One:  Have a Western-style ceremony, with white gown and tuxedo, then have a reception in Japanese kimono, with more attending the reception than the ceremony.  Two:  Have a Shinto-style ceremony in kimono, and switch to a Western party for the reception (again in white gown and tuxedo).  Three:  Fly to Hawaii or another country with just family and close friends and have a Western-style affair.  Our friends Steve and Valerie opted for the first type.  Their ceremony was mostly in Japanese, with a missionary friend performing the ceremony.  Another friend sang a song on guitar, which is not typically done.  Afterward, the guests had pictures with the bride and groom, then showered the couple with rose petals.  We all headed for the reception (the hotel provided a bus if you needed a ride) while Steve and Valerie changed into their kimono.  The reception was held at the Welcome to the Moon restaurant near Izumi-chuo station.  We visited and had soft drinks while waiting for the bride and groom to arrive.  After they arrived, we had many small courses of food, both Japanese and Western.  At the end, the couple gave everyone a small thank-you gift (a clock for the men, and a bubble bath set for the women).  Most people give money as the wedding gift to help offset the costs of the wedding, rather than dishes and appliances.  All in all, it was a fun experience. 

The couple is showered with rose petals.

Steve and Valerie in their traditional attire.

As April passed, Barbara was mostly winding up her affairs at school, getting ready for her maternity leave.  She decided to make the Spring Concert a little early, April instead of May.  It was difficult to get around the stage 8 months pregnant, but everything worked out just fine.  The faculty at TIS and the parents gave us two separate baby showers.  We got lots of great clothes, blankets and toys. 

The guests tried to guess how large Barbara's girth was with lengths of toilet paper.  A first-grade son of one of the teachers came closest!	One of Barbara's students poses with us and the lovely mechanical swing the parents gave us.
Barbara's K4 class helps present her flowers.

About the middle of April, we were barraged with loudspeakers from sunup to sundown.  Every few years, the city has local elections.  The candidates ride around in vans with loudspeakers attached to the top, calling out "Vote for [candidate's name here]!  Thank you very much!" in very high pitched voices.  Sometimes the vans would park, and the candidate would give a little speech to all passersby.  Within a few days, we were all pretty sick of the noise.  We lived on the major street in our neighborhood of Komatsushima - so everyone running passed by several times a day. Closer to the election, the candidates' voices and speeches would (seemingly to Todd) get more enthusiastic, brash and downright pushy. Thankfully, the local election season is relatively short! 

This picture was taken right outside our building.  Our apartment faced the street.

Another sign of spring - the cherry blossoms at Toshogu temple.

Well, finally, at the beginning of May, the big day arrived.  Barbara had been in to have external monitoring done on the baby's heart rate.  Every couple of days they checked her, because the first time the readings had been "non-reactive."  In case you haven't been through this, the mother has belts strapped around her belly, with an electronic monitor attached to a machine.  Every time the baby moved, Barbara was to press a button.  If the baby's heart rate increased, then this was a good sign.  Only problem was, the baby slept most of the day, and moved most during the evening and nighttime.  So Barbara was advised to come into the office within two hours of eating, when the baby would be more active.  After several tests, the doctor was satisfied that everything was normal.

Late on May 5, Barbara started to feel contractions.  They were pretty mild, but still kept her awake much of the night.  The next day, Todd went to work, expecting to get a call at any time.  The day passed without change. But in the early hours of May 7, the contractions got closer together.  We went in, but Barbara had only dilated 1 cm.  So they sent us home.  About 6 hours later, we tried again.  She was only 2 cm dilated.  Well, Barbara had had enough - she decided to stay at the hospital just in case.  Todd got the day off, and we kept each other company as Barbara tried to sleep.  Unfortunately, the contractions never really got closer together than 3 minutes, and sometimes got farther apart. Barbara had a sleepless night, spending much of her time attempting to sleep in a birthing chair. The bed was just too uncomfortable for her. By the morning of May 8, we were faced with only 5 cm of dilation and a VERY tired mother-to-be.  Even though Barbara had really wanted to have a natural childbirth, she made a tearful decision to have a cesarean section.  So Barbara got prepped, Todd got into scrubs (the largest size they had barely fit him) and waited in the father's room for almost 2 hours.  There were an awful lot of people in the operating room.  Probably 7 nurses, plus the doctor, all with some specific job.  They gave Barbara spinal anesthesia, which took hold in 10-15 minutes.  Then the doctor arrived, and they let Todd in.  He was required to wash his hands twice, put on one of those elasticized hats, and wear a set of sanitized slippers. He was allowed to bring in his video camera and has about half of the procedure videotaped from a discreet distance. Happily, they allowed Barbara to watch the entire procedure in a mirror.  Since it didn't hurt, Barbara felt an odd detachment in watching the doctor cut through so many layers to get at the baby.  At 4:25pm, the baby was man-handled out of the womb.  She had a full-head of dark curly hair and was 8 lbs, 7 oz. and 21 in. long. For Todd, witnessing the birth was an intense, exciting and exhausting experience. Todd was able to hold the baby in the operating room, and deliver the baby to a smiling Mommy.

After cleaning the baby up, Barbara was able to try to breastfeed and hold the baby.  But all too soon, she was taken to the nursery with Todd so that Barbara could recover in the recovery room.  There were no other cesareans performed that day or the next, so Barbara had the rather large (4-hospital bed) room all to herself.  Todd brought her a TV/VCR combo, a DVD player and LOTS of videos to watch.  Barbara had wanted to room in with the baby, but was too weak to care for the baby.  Every chance she had, she had the baby in the room to try to feed.  It wasn't enough time, though.  At three days, Barbara was recovered enough to go back to her own room (we paid for a private room, but most people in the maternity hospital had shared rooms).  At this point, the baby came to stay.

The first few days with the baby were really rough.  Barbara's milk came in very slowly, and the amount was low for days.  The baby didn't breastfeed easily as a result. There was still a lot of pain in the incision, and Todd could only come visit for about 4 hours in the evening, since he had to work and wasn't allowed to stay overnight.   By the time the baby was 6 days old, the nurses were giving the baby glucose water between 11pm and 7am so that Barbara could sleep and replenish herself.  Through it all, the nurses were SO helpful and doted on us every moment.  Even though they pushed the idea of using formula or glucose water a bit too much, they respected our wishes to breastfeed as much as possible.  And the food was good!  Very healthy and delicious. Perfect for a recovering mother and a healthy newborn baby.

At ten days, Barbara and the baby were allowed to go home.  A few days later, Barbara's mother and step-father came to visit and help.  The five of us shared our tiny one-bedroom apartment.  We had to keep supplementing with glucose water whenever the milk ran low, but we managed.  A few weeks later, Barbara started using Fenugreek seed supplements.  That really helped her milk production, and now the baby doesn't need much supplementation at all!

3 days old.

Her first big smile - 6 weeks.

We planned to go home for a month in the summer, so quite a bit of paperwork was needed.  The baby needed an alien registration card, proof of birth abroad, a passport, a visa and a Social Security Card. Most things could be done in Sendai or by mail, but not the passport.  Barbara discovered that a personal trip to an embassy or consulate was required and got really worried.  Todd couldn't afford to take off work, and Barbara had the baby to consider.  There is no consulate in Sendai, so it meant a trip to Tokyo or Sapporo.  Barbara's mother suggested that she could go along with her to help with the baby.  Well, we've been to Tokyo, but not Sapporo.  It is farther away, but we didn't really realize how much farther until we started planning the trip.  Tokyo is about 5-6 hours drive.  Sapporo would be 4 hours to the top of the island, a 7 hour ferry ride and 2 more hours by car.  Or one can take the overnight ferry from Sendai (14 hours).  That was out of the question, with a 2 week old baby!  So we buckled under and paid for a flight (only 1 hour and 10 minutes).

While we were there, we managed to see 3 famous Sapporo sights.  The day we arrived, we took a gondola ride to the top of Mt. Moiwa, and looked out over the city.  The next day after going to the consulate, we visited a large temple complex, Hokkaido Temple.  The buildings were very well-maintained, in gorgeous glowing wood.  All by chance, we were able to hop on the city sight-seeing bus, which took us to the Sapporo Beer Museum.  By another lucky break, we arrived at the same time as a large group of JETs (Japan Exchange Teachers) from Tokyo who had arranged for an English-language tour.  The factory tour shows the history of beer making in Japan and ends with a tasting session.  We skipped that part since Barbara isn't drinking anyway, and since our flight was leaving soon. 

The view from the top of Mt. Moiwa.	Hokkaido Temple.
Barbara, the baby and grandma in the Sapporo Beer Museum.

One of the traditional Japanese celebrations we had never before experienced was Tanabata. Similar to huge tassels suspended from the ceiling, these Tanabata are brightly colored and elaborately decorated. These tassels typically consist of a huge paper sphere from which a cylindrical set of paper streamers descend to within a meter or so off the ground. The paper streamers come in all forms -- some with prints or paintings, some with Origami pasted onto them, some made entirely of Origami, and some on which prayers to the gods have been written. Some businesses also have their own Tanabata festively advertising their products or services. 

Even though the true festival date is July 7, Tanabata in Sendai runs for three days about a month later (usually Aug. 6-8). The three of us, and some good Japanese friends, decided to brave the very crowded pedestrian mall in downtown Sendai for a glimpse at these monstrous tassels.

Beginning at Clis Road, and making our way through the Ichibancho pedestrian shopping street, we were assaulted by color and craftsmanship at such a pace that it seemed we were pushing away branches from trees in the Tanabata Forest. At times the pedestrian mall was so dense we had difficulty getting through the crowd -- and streamers -- with our baby stroller. But that did not take away from our appreciation of the festival! One of the more remarkable streamers we saw consisted of tiny Origami cranes made in commemoration of -- and symbolic reminder of -- the devastating loss of life at Hiroshima. At least three such Tanabata were made collectively using more than 1 million of these small paper cranes.

Eating lunch in downtown Sendai on a festival day is difficult enough. But during Tanabata it seemed as if standing in line for a meal was commonplace. Thankfully, we had good Japanese friends! They led us to a good, and relatively inexpensive, Japanese restaurant where we had Gyu-Tan (beef tongue -- a Sendai specialty).        

Todd and baby on Clis Road.	Our Japanese friend's daughter and cousin play with the tanabata.
Barbara and more of the tanabata.
The Hiroshima tanabata made entirely of origami cranes.	A traditional gyu-tan meal: beef tongue, rice with barley, and soup.

We start school next week, and the baby will go to a daycare very close by school.  We are a bit nervous and sad to be leaving her during the day, but it can't be helped - so we're making the best of it.  We know she will be loved and cared for.  It is a small daycare, with only 5-6 children, and 2 workers.  She will be the only baby as of now.  We hope that means she will get a lot of attention as well.

Hope your summer ends well and you are all blessed,

Todd and Barbara Thomas